Friday Night

Well i havent posted online in a looong time and here i am back again.  I usually find myself mainly writing during times when my life is fucked up. btw this is just gunna be like a personal journal/diary for myself and future self to read so if you somehow stumbled upon this page then leave now or forever hold your peace. ok so at this current time in my life i am a senior in college and just about to start midterms next week. I am trying to quit smoking as of this weekend. My girlfriend and i are on a ‘break’ and she has a fucker over at my house right now and almost every other night.  which is the main reason why im writing again. I love her so much and its too hard to let go. today i took what was supposed to be a 3hr train ride home, which turned into a 5 hour-all-day-thing cuz the train was delayed. and all i could do was think about her. I texted her on the way down but no response and im still awake now cuz she didnt say goodnight. I know that sounds immature or whatever, but ive just grown accustomed to saying goodnight to her everynight cuz weve been doing it for at least 6 years now.  So its just lame cuz shes over there fucking some ugly stupid dude while im over here thinking about it since she doesnt have the decency to say goodnight. end rant.